This is extra FAQ for NewBoBs about the forums. I made it as an add-on to the main FAQ. Feel free to make corrections or add-ons if you feel I missed anything.
Q: What's the deal with mopping?
A: Mopping is our own homegrown form of initiation, and is explained rather fully in synkr0nized's "What do they mean by mop? A ClanBOB guide". NewBobs usually emote mopping (example: *Despanan mops the thread*) in the "Newbie Check In" thread, but you can mop anywhere. NewBoBs should continue to mop until an ElderBoB or moderator tells them they can stop. For the record, mopping is not degrading in any way. It's simply an unique way to get to know the people here and feel out the forum's atmosphere. So grab a mop and help out!
Q: How do I get a BoB name?
A: BoB names are nicknames handed out by the moderators. You don't really need to do anything to get one, so just wait until a mod decides to "Bob" you. Usually you'll get one after being here a few months. BoB names aren't very important, so don't sweat it if you don't have one. You're a BoB even if you don't have one and you certainly don't need one. I've been a BoB longer than most BoBs here, and as you can see I still don't have one.
Q: Am I still a NewBob?
A: If you're asking yourself that question, than yes, you probably are. Here at ClanBoB, NewBoBness has little to do with the amount of time you spend here or your post count. There's no set limit or magic number, and a mod isn't going to come around and tell you you're no longer new. But when you aren't new, you'll know it and so will everyone else. It's kinda like being in love.
Q: Are you sure? I've been lurking...
A: Quite sure, lurkers aren't BoBs until they make themselves known. Are you a Mason simply because you've peeked in their window?
Q: Is 1337 k3wl?
A: No.
Q: Forums, Threads, and Posts, OH MY!
A: Forum is a term for large collections of threads. The Main Hall, LoR, Movies, Music, and the like. They each have a topic to better organize the discussions. Thus if you want to talk about Anime, post it in the Anime Forum. A thread is an individual topic, inside a forum. This "Extended FAQ" is a thread. A post is the text each person contributes to a thread.
Q: How do I add an avatar to my profile?
A: Xaenyth explains how to right here.
Q: People keep saying "fucktard." What does it mean?
A: Fucktard, (Fuhk-tard) noun One who is a fucking retard. eg: The fucktard didn't mop!adjective: Describes an action or person who is both stupid and inept. eg: That was fucktardedly stupid.
Q: What about "stellies?" What does that mean?
A: Stellies, (Stel-iez) noun A euphemism for testicles. eg: OHJ NOES! Em00re just got kicked in the
stellies! or Man, Synkr0nized must have stellies of steel!
Q: I think i found a plot hole in "Life of Riley"...
A: A wizard did it.
Q: Man I'm depressed/need help with a girlfriend/insert other whine, may I tell you guys about it?
A: Sharing your feelings and asking for advice is fine, to an extent. But I would caution you against doing it right away and all the time. Here's the reasoning: if you're new you're basically just pouring your heart out to total strangers, they're going to think you're a little weird. If some random kid in emo glasses came up to you and suddenly started telling you his deepest darkest fears and insecurities I'm pretty sure you'd be freaked out. I know I would. Extremely high levels of self-disclosure are only suitable for close friends, and if someone you barely know starts treating you like a close friend, it's creepy. Also, if someone is constantly depressed they're really annoying. Look at Strong Sad for crying out loud.
Q: What are the forum rules?
A: The rules are here, and the mods are (thankfully) lax with their banstick. There's a few unspoken rules as well, like avoiding excessive errors in spelling and grammar. In all the time I've been here, only a few people have been banned, so if you do get banned you've *really* fucked up.
Q: What's RIP's Deal?
A: He needs a hug. Go give him one.
Q: What should I do to be respected here?
A: Post as maturely and intelligently as you can. If you respect the other BoBs they'll respect you.
Q: Who's the coolest BoB here?
A:Emoore
Q: What is the ClanBoB hierarchy?
A: there is no established clanBoB hierarchy. According to Aaron we are all equal. YAY!
*Edit: While there is no established (as in official) hierarchy, we do have posters who command more "respect." They are the ElderBoBs (see ElderBoBs below)
Q: I've been a lurker since the first ClanBoB forum, That means I'm an ElderBoB By default right?
A: WRONG, The title of Elder BoB is limited only to those who were actually regular forum members, not lurkers and not people who just read Life of Riley.
Q: If I'm here long enough can I become an ElderBoB?
A: Actually, I'm not sure, there hasn't really been much talk about if ElderBoBs are fixed to those who have been here before the Great Crash or if the title is flexible. My advice would be to not sweat it. Titles don't really matter.
Q:What is the deal with the Stinies?
A: Ya got me there, As far as I know It's a thread filled with random silliness inspired by the Superhero Name StrongBad Email. It's founder 2D (Deathsycthe) had this to say:
Q:Why ClanBoB? Why not have the site's URL as "LifeofRiley.com" ?
A: Originally, ClanBoB was not mainly a comic site, but instead a clan For new Gamers. Here they could get together, chat, and have fun. Also "Life of Riley" was not the only comic. Many other comics were hosted here, all of which were drawn by BoBs.
Q: So what comics were Hosted?
A: youthtopia was done by Emoore
zero done by zero
Middle finger of Frustration by Akukage/DDD
Illogical lifeby sniper CT
Gamer: the Delusion written by Duck, KaliskaNny and Rip, drawn By Duck, lettered by KaliskaNny (It's really complicated apparently.)
Samurai Mushroomby Dragomun
Kaizen by Cowkitty
SHNDP by NeonDevil
Sore Thumbz by Brian Smeg
and a few others found here
Q: Are Any other characters based off Real people? like Dan, Aaron and William?
A: Yes and no. Some characters are real some are not. as far as I know Dan, Aaron, William, Cowkitty, The BoBs, Bunny steve, the six godesses, electric pixie, and evil Dan are real while Jone, Dahn, Jezebel, Nasia, Tess, the vampires (except for daniel Escalante, who is evil Dan) And Random Gamer Chick are not.
Q: So I can never "be" with Jone?
A: 'Fraid not
Q: What about Gore?
A: Well Kinda, While Gore is a fictional character, he is loosely based off of Dan. Almost like a Dark side or Alter Ego. So if you wanna meet Gore, Track down Dan.
Q: What's the Deal With
Dan's Cheekbones?
A: He has a sexy man-chin. End of story
Q: Can I ever experience ClanBoB like the ElderBoBs did?
A: Not directly, but, thanks to Agent #1! Important Ancient BoB documents have been discovered. I want all you newBoBs to pull out your notebooks and study these records extensively, they WILL be on the final exam...
Recovered document #1
recovered document #2
these documents have lead our intrepid explorer to discover the Ruins of the lost BoB City. Feel free to explore them, but beware of traps and those pesky temple guards!
Q: I want to start a crew!
A: ok, first let me caution you against this, The first crew wars were devistating, a second one could very well leave ClanBoB a smoking pile of radioactive waste populated by pseudo-zombieBoBs. Still If you're gonna do it you might as well do it right! here's how:
Q: Ya Know, I've Just noticed that this place acts like a mini community! i think I'll write...
A: STOP RIGHT THERE we Know that ClanBoB is like a community, because it IS a community. Believe me I know how you feel. You think that you're the first person to ever have this Idea, but you're not, trust me. It probobly sounds like a good idea to you to preform some sort o quazi-experiment on the BoBs in the name of sociology (and of course your own ego inflation) but it's not. Everyone and their sister has written some sort of a paper about an "experiment" they did in a chatroom or some other anonymous interenet place. What will happen is that you'll piss off everyone here and really accomplish little more than trolling. You may prove a few points such as: "People get angry when you insult them" and "People don't like people who pretend to be other people for their own amusment". Good luck on that Nobel prize...fucktard.
Q: Hye, remeber that first EzBoard forum? the one before the crash? WTF happened to it?
A: Two words: GIANT SPIDERS.
...ok I'm kidding, Merc explains it right here:
Q: ok time for some BoB history (or perhaps "Histeria"
)
A: From what I have been through, and peiced together from ElderBoB accounts, here are some major events in ClanBoB history, Know collectively as the BoB Chronicals:
The Founding of ClanBoB:
According to Dan, ClanBoB was founded in early 2000. Here's a first Hand account from our very own
doctor tofu
!
The Golden Age of BOB
If you've ever talked to an elder, You'll realise that ClanBoB was once very different than it is today, here is a first hand account of this mythical age from Rip*:
*Warning: Trusting Rip may be hazardous
to your health.
Dan the Mad Scientist
Dan spawns 4 genetically altered Bio-children from his secret lab, miles below the Earth's crust. He names them Nuku, Jynk, KaliskaNny and Kattawa beween bouts of minaiacle laughter.
The original "BoBs" Storyline
Beginning in June 2001, The first (and possibly the greatest) Story Arc of "Life of Riley" Began. For more information see comic #111 entitled "And So..." in the Archives.
The "Great Crash"
A great Cataclysim shook the server. Many Bobs were lost in the days and weeks which followed...here is a first-hand account from ElderBoB and Crash Survivor
Phantomgrift:
the .net Rebirth
And yet, when all hope (as well as the backup disks) seemed lost, the LeaderBoBs prevailed and rebuilt their great clan, Snatching it from the very jaws of defeat...And there was much rejoicing. "YAAAY!
*[Note, this is when your humble historian First stumbled upon the Bobs, so from now on the records will be much more accurate
]
Penny-Shima
During the September of 2002, The Leader BoBs made a bold decision, to kidnap Gabriel of Penny Arcade forcing his regent Tycho to inform their Multitudes of ClanBoB. Hundreds of initiates flocked to the clan. Still, their arrival was bittersweet, as the current forums could not handle the influx. What followed has become known (to me) as "The Great Migration"
The Great Migration
The BoBs (Both old and new) traveled together to TWC
The Time of Troubles
Yet, all was not well in the land of TWC. The realm was in fact quite volatile. scores of BoBs were lost or banished in the dozens of small eruptions and crashes. To make matters worse, The BoBs were governed by Pierre AKA "Fruitad". A wicked and corrupt Regent.
The Hedonistic Gatherings
what happens when a bunch of Horney young people get together? why they have lots and lots of sex of course. It was during the time of troubles that a pessimistic Australian by the name of Lazarus began the first "Sex Thread' entitled "Stop Humping my leg". many more such gatherings soon followed. Such behavior was sneered upon by the ElderBoB's, who saw such expenditures as "wasteful". The threads nevertheless continued on for some time.
The Crew Wars
A long time ago, in a Forum far far away war broke out. Without Ample ElderBoB Leadership, The NewBoB's fractured into tribes called "Crews". The First documented Crew was the LOR "Rock-Metal Crew" but many soon followed. While a great many BoBs abstained from what they thought "A Fad" Crews became a force to be reconed with. With the factioning came increased tension, which soon broke out into BoB Civil war. (Sparked By Mechzilla for reasons unknown at this time). In the End the crew wars truly had no winner, and eventually brought about the demise of nearly every crew. The only crew left alive currently is the Martial Arts Crew, which remained neutral in the conflict.
The Cult of the Stinies
In the Fall of 2002, a bizzare gathering took place. Upon this day 2D called upon fellow BoBs to become "Stinies". in the weeks and month which followed, 2D's following grew to exponential preportions. The Cult went through quite a few different incarnations, culminating in one known as "Stiney, Get me a Danish". Shunned by many for their "Spamish" Behavior, the Stinies endured. Dispite many hardships and objections they persist even to this day.
The founding of Slashtopia and subsequent "Slashtopian War"
After the destruction wrought by the Crew Wars, a new nation was formed by SlashInfinity, the soveirgn nation of "Slashtopia". Almost immediatly, the Dark Lord Rip declaired Slashtopia an affront to himself and lead a massive war against the new nation, under the rallying cry of "Fuck Slashtopia." Rip's minions and allies marched onto the battle feild. to this ay I am not clear on why, but a few weeks into the war Rip pulled back his armies. perhaps he went mad, or felt that the slashtopians had fought well enough to exist, or more likely he just became bored. Either way, Slashtopia was spared from destruction.
The BoB Exodust
Lead By the
Goddess CowkittyThe BoBs (though there was some dissent among the youngsters who had know TWC as their only home) packed up and moved yet again. As the BoB's uncerimoniosly threw off the proverbial yoke of Fruitaid and set off into the unknown. Shortly thereafter, Returning to their native lands, the very EZBoards where we find ourselves currently.
The EZ Renaissance
With the BoBs once again upon their native soil, Ancient BoB traditions Returned. Practices such as Mopping and BoB naming, which had become lax during the Time of Troubles, Once again took the center stage. These Practices were embraced by BoBs young and old alike, as they pulled together in an attempt to re-create the Ancient BoB utopia destroyed in the Great Crash.
The "Five"
Some time after the beginning of the renissance, the BoB's aquired a few new artists. (hopefully someone will fill me in on who and how) Dan looked upon the new 5 day a week "life of Riley" and saw that it was good. And there was much rejoicing.
Indiana Agent
Renown Archeologist an nazi fighter Agent #1 discovers the lost ruins of pre-crash ClanBoB. for the first time non-elder BoBs are grante a first hand peek into BoB history. (Hopefully Agent #1 will grace us with a tale of his dangerous journey!)
The end of "the Five"
Dan Goes on Sabbatical, and then comes back at Full power. Dan returns Life of Riley to it's original state, smiting his artist Demi Gods like the Titian Chronos. I think he ate Brian.
The Banishment of Franger
The infamous outlaw known only as "Franger" was finally captured by "The Man". Apparently he took his crime spree just a little too far. To the delight of some and the dissapointment of others, Regent Mercan Banished him from the Clan of BoB, never to return...Though sometimes, when the moon is full...it is said that you can hear him Howling in the night..FUUUCKSPEEEEAARRR!
The Attempted Crew Revival
Some dilligent NewBoBs, upon reading the histories, decided to attempt to re-create the age of crews, and perhapse ensight the crew wars once again. The first new Crew was Synkr0nized's "Tank Crew" but a few others followed. This attempted revival lasted for about a week an then died. The only casualty was my dignity.
The Bay of Ubersite incident
ClanBoB came close to it's very first internationl Flame-war when two members of the Ubersite community came to spam ClanBoB at the behest of the infamous Franger. While both their attacks were quite futile, many BoBs were no dount irritated. Xaenyth, a BoB from TWC, declared war on Ubersite, an Idea embraced by many BoBs. The Xaenyth retracted his earlier statement and made an informal "treaty" with one Ubersite poster "Raviebaby". Still many BoBs did not want peace, but longed to begin an anti-Ubersite campaign, which angered Xaenyth. In the end it was revealed that the entire instance was a hoax concoted by a psuedo-journalist as "research" for an article. this outraged many BoBs more that the original insults. I believe there was at least one call for the unfortuante firebrand's head.
The End of The LOR forum
And out of the darkness, like a theif in the night the Leader BoBs did battle with the now nearly deserted Lor forum. It had grown craven and evil with the absence of posting, and thus they threw down their opponent and smote it's ruin upon the mountainside...or something. i'm really not sure what happened, i woke up one day and it was gone.
The Banishment of the Twin Trolls
With the power vaccume caused by the banishment of the great outlaw known as Franger, and the noted absence of the Dark Lord Rip. New contenders to the throne of Supream Troll Arose. Chief amongst them were those known as 2D, the founder of the stinies, who was turned evil by continued use the One Ring of Power, and another named McTen. I myself am not sure just what happened, but after repeated warining and a temporary suspension, Regent Mercan Apprehended the trouble makers and banished them from the garden of BoB, to forever wander the net in stigeon darkness...or the Stiny.org forums, whichever really.
The Redemption of Cain
Cain, one of the oldest and most terrible forces of evil ever to stalk the halls and floors of ClanBoB, was defeated. Not by the forces of Mercan and the other Leader BoBs, but by the birth of his first child. Where once a terrible force of nature that motherBoBs warned their newbie's about stood, now there was a changed man; One of goodness and charity.
The Return of Evil Cain
...And it was all a filthy lie! Cain never had a child! He never turned good! He came in and kicked sand in my eyes...Ok so we probobly shouldn't have seen this coming. He even tricked me into driving his drunk ass to the hospital. Babes wail in fear and motherbobs go back to using him as an incentive to get newbobs to eat their vegetables. boo fucking hoo
The "Boondocking" of the Mafia
And Lo, I, your humble historian, did see that corruption in ClanBoB did go unchecked and I along with Stelteck, Zengus, and a few others did go Boondock Saints on the ClanBoB Mafia. We waged a private war against corruption throughout the forums. Blood flowed, bullets flew, and silly things happened. Individually we killed off most of the active members, including their leader Pheebs, but we were all brought lo (killed) by Revolution Man (the "Discipliner") unleashing a pokemon-like Iraqi with a pipe bomb up his ass. I declaired Victory, and the war was over, though a few wished it to continue. And So the Saints disappear into the past. perhaps someday, when
corruption again strikes this forum, we shall return and rain divine Justice upon the evildoers, for:
Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked, shall flow like a river. the three shall spread their blackened wings and be the vengeful striking hammer of God.
The Re-birth of the LOR Forum
And LO, like the Proverbial Pheonix rising from the Proverbial Ashes and returning to full Proverbial Glory the Proverbial LOR Forum...wait...that's not proverbial...that's real...well sorta...*ahem!* ANYWAY the Not-Quite-Proverbial-But-In-Fact-Sorta-Real LOR Forum returned...I think.
The Disappearance of the LeaderBOBs
A terrible trajedy struck the Halls of of BOBlimpus, home of the leaderBOBs, when what we assume to be a freind of the LeaderBOBs took his own life. The ClanBOB.net site went down, at first it was meant to be for a week, then two weeks, then no word. Even Regent Merchan was left in the dark. Many of the BOBs began to wonder if they would be forced to wander the world in stigeon darkness till the end of time, eating only suffering and breathing only pain. Many cried that the Day of BOBnarock, the Twilight of the Clan was at hand, while others Prophecised that Aaron and Dan would return, as both an olive branch and scythe, bringing judment for the wicked and retoring the rule of the LeaderBOB. For now, we must wait and see.
Crew Wars II
Once again without the prescence of the LeaderBOBs, the Clan was thrown into uncertain anarchy, Two groups came out of the Chaos to jockey for power, the "BREAD CREW", started by myself, the one true path to total bready goodness, and the "MEAT CREW" Started by that godless butcher Soul Reaper, an affront to all that is human and moral. Both groups were actually a euphamism for the argument between Religion and Science (inspired by an analogy of a Butcher trying to do a bakers Job, while actively working to denounce the value of the baker's bread, and vice versa) but soon other Food-Related Crews sprang up, such as the "Cheese Crew" "the Human Brains Crew" and the cheif enemy of both Bread and Meat, "The Pizza Crew". The Pizza Crew eventually won the day, after a long, costly, and silly battle with both the Bread and Meat Crews. Then, just as Mechzilla was declaring victory, the Bread crew rose again, as thousands of big bready zombies and devored the Pizza Crew's brains, therfor making the "Human Brains Crew" the winner.
The Aaron Cometh
And LO, the LeaderBOB Aaron didst see that in his absence, the BOBs were lost. Some had even begun to worship golden calves and such...ith. and lo he didst return and reforge clanBOB, and bring aboutith more DiD episodes. sadly, his Brother Dan was stillith nowhere to be...foundith...ith.
ClanBOB 2: Electric Boogaloo
and...well I guess Dan came back and started LOR again...hey gimmie a break I spent like 5 minutes thinking of that title.
that's all for now, Have fun and I hope you enjoy ClanboB as much as i do.
*edited 9/13/05 for formatting*
*edited 9/14/05 for spelling/grammar*
Q: What's the deal with mopping?
A: Mopping is our own homegrown form of initiation, and is explained rather fully in synkr0nized's "What do they mean by mop? A ClanBOB guide". NewBobs usually emote mopping (example: *Despanan mops the thread*) in the "Newbie Check In" thread, but you can mop anywhere. NewBoBs should continue to mop until an ElderBoB or moderator tells them they can stop. For the record, mopping is not degrading in any way. It's simply an unique way to get to know the people here and feel out the forum's atmosphere. So grab a mop and help out!
Q: How do I get a BoB name?
A: BoB names are nicknames handed out by the moderators. You don't really need to do anything to get one, so just wait until a mod decides to "Bob" you. Usually you'll get one after being here a few months. BoB names aren't very important, so don't sweat it if you don't have one. You're a BoB even if you don't have one and you certainly don't need one. I've been a BoB longer than most BoBs here, and as you can see I still don't have one.
Q: Am I still a NewBob?
A: If you're asking yourself that question, than yes, you probably are. Here at ClanBoB, NewBoBness has little to do with the amount of time you spend here or your post count. There's no set limit or magic number, and a mod isn't going to come around and tell you you're no longer new. But when you aren't new, you'll know it and so will everyone else. It's kinda like being in love.
Q: Are you sure? I've been lurking...
A: Quite sure, lurkers aren't BoBs until they make themselves known. Are you a Mason simply because you've peeked in their window?
Q: Is 1337 k3wl?
A: No.
Q: Forums, Threads, and Posts, OH MY!
A: Forum is a term for large collections of threads. The Main Hall, LoR, Movies, Music, and the like. They each have a topic to better organize the discussions. Thus if you want to talk about Anime, post it in the Anime Forum. A thread is an individual topic, inside a forum. This "Extended FAQ" is a thread. A post is the text each person contributes to a thread.
Q: How do I add an avatar to my profile?
A: Xaenyth explains how to right here.
Q: People keep saying "fucktard." What does it mean?
A: Fucktard, (Fuhk-tard) noun One who is a fucking retard. eg: The fucktard didn't mop!adjective: Describes an action or person who is both stupid and inept. eg: That was fucktardedly stupid.
Q: What about "stellies?" What does that mean?
A: Stellies, (Stel-iez) noun A euphemism for testicles. eg: OHJ NOES! Em00re just got kicked in the
stellies! or Man, Synkr0nized must have stellies of steel!
Q: I think i found a plot hole in "Life of Riley"...
A: A wizard did it.
Q: Man I'm depressed/need help with a girlfriend/insert other whine, may I tell you guys about it?
A: Sharing your feelings and asking for advice is fine, to an extent. But I would caution you against doing it right away and all the time. Here's the reasoning: if you're new you're basically just pouring your heart out to total strangers, they're going to think you're a little weird. If some random kid in emo glasses came up to you and suddenly started telling you his deepest darkest fears and insecurities I'm pretty sure you'd be freaked out. I know I would. Extremely high levels of self-disclosure are only suitable for close friends, and if someone you barely know starts treating you like a close friend, it's creepy. Also, if someone is constantly depressed they're really annoying. Look at Strong Sad for crying out loud.
Q: What are the forum rules?
A: The rules are here, and the mods are (thankfully) lax with their banstick. There's a few unspoken rules as well, like avoiding excessive errors in spelling and grammar. In all the time I've been here, only a few people have been banned, so if you do get banned you've *really* fucked up.
Q: What's RIP's Deal?
A: He needs a hug. Go give him one.
Q: What should I do to be respected here?
A: Post as maturely and intelligently as you can. If you respect the other BoBs they'll respect you.
Q: Who's the coolest BoB here?
A:Emoore
Q: What is the ClanBoB hierarchy?
A: there is no established clanBoB hierarchy. According to Aaron we are all equal. YAY!
*Edit: While there is no established (as in official) hierarchy, we do have posters who command more "respect." They are the ElderBoBs (see ElderBoBs below)
Quote:
Originally posted by Zoo:
Q: What is an elderBOB and why do they come off as grumpy old war veterans?
A: An elder bob is somebody who was here three forums ago, that is when we were at EZboards before ClanBoB's own EZBoard and the TWC (Top Web Comics) forums. It's not really known why they are so grumpy, we all just assume that they were put through some sort of ClanBOB boot camp, which upon completion left them cold and emotionless.
Q: I've been a lurker since the first ClanBoB forum, That means I'm an ElderBoB By default right?
A: WRONG, The title of Elder BoB is limited only to those who were actually regular forum members, not lurkers and not people who just read Life of Riley.
Q: If I'm here long enough can I become an ElderBoB?
A: Actually, I'm not sure, there hasn't really been much talk about if ElderBoBs are fixed to those who have been here before the Great Crash or if the title is flexible. My advice would be to not sweat it. Titles don't really matter.
Q:What is the deal with the Stinies?
A: Ya got me there, As far as I know It's a thread filled with random silliness inspired by the Superhero Name StrongBad Email. It's founder 2D (Deathsycthe) had this to say:
Quote:
*Clears throat* "It was aperfect Autums' day. The Trees had turned and the Squirrels were good and fat in their trees. I had just finished watching Sir. StrongBad Chronicle Number Twenty Nine: Superhero Name. I then thought I would begin a Juvinile joke upon the forum goers by calling them to become Stinies. Bailey was first, and followed by others. During the age of TWC we had froliced in three threads, the begining thread die. The recruiting thread lit aflame and died, yet the third thread flourished to 20,002 posts(Curses BM#6340490238awwwfuckit). Then it was closed right before the switch back to EZBoards. Then Hormaphodiety(Xae) started a Stiny thread. Yet I bashed it with my cudel and did pistols at dawn with this She-He! I had won and begam the true Fifth Stiny thread that we are blessed with today as people attack me outside of it talking that it's spam.
And that's the story of how a small joke has lost all meaning and become a way of life.
Q:Why ClanBoB? Why not have the site's URL as "LifeofRiley.com" ?
A: Originally, ClanBoB was not mainly a comic site, but instead a clan For new Gamers. Here they could get together, chat, and have fun. Also "Life of Riley" was not the only comic. Many other comics were hosted here, all of which were drawn by BoBs.
Q: So what comics were Hosted?
A: youthtopia was done by Emoore
zero done by zero
Middle finger of Frustration by Akukage/DDD
Illogical lifeby sniper CT
Gamer: the Delusion written by Duck, KaliskaNny and Rip, drawn By Duck, lettered by KaliskaNny (It's really complicated apparently.)
Samurai Mushroomby Dragomun
Kaizen by Cowkitty
SHNDP by NeonDevil
Sore Thumbz by Brian Smeg
and a few others found here
Quote:
Posted by Cain:
Q: Are JT, Rip and cain that mean in real life?
A: Yes
Q: I'd give them what-for if I met them IRL
A: Go for it, Just dont post a thread complaining about how you got your ass kicked.
Q: Are Any other characters based off Real people? like Dan, Aaron and William?
A: Yes and no. Some characters are real some are not. as far as I know Dan, Aaron, William, Cowkitty, The BoBs, Bunny steve, the six godesses, electric pixie, and evil Dan are real while Jone, Dahn, Jezebel, Nasia, Tess, the vampires (except for daniel Escalante, who is evil Dan) And Random Gamer Chick are not.
Q: So I can never "be" with Jone?
A: 'Fraid not
Q: What about Gore?
A: Well Kinda, While Gore is a fictional character, he is loosely based off of Dan. Almost like a Dark side or Alter Ego. So if you wanna meet Gore, Track down Dan.
Q: What's the Deal With
Dan's Cheekbones?
A: He has a sexy man-chin. End of story
Q: Can I ever experience ClanBoB like the ElderBoBs did?
A: Not directly, but, thanks to Agent #1! Important Ancient BoB documents have been discovered. I want all you newBoBs to pull out your notebooks and study these records extensively, they WILL be on the final exam...
Recovered document #1
recovered document #2
these documents have lead our intrepid explorer to discover the Ruins of the lost BoB City. Feel free to explore them, but beware of traps and those pesky temple guards!
Q: I want to start a crew!
A: ok, first let me caution you against this, The first crew wars were devistating, a second one could very well leave ClanBoB a smoking pile of radioactive waste populated by pseudo-zombieBoBs. Still If you're gonna do it you might as well do it right! here's how:
Quote:
Originally posted by Sporks:
If you were going to start, say, the caffine junkey crew, you would start a thread. In the first post you would explain your crew's aims and interests. Then you would say "SOUND OFF!" and you might take your number, for example, Caffine Junkey Crew #1, or #2, or #50. The numbers usualy are taken in order, to show how quickly you joined (and therefore, how much better you are then everyone else with a bigger number), but sometims people claim certen numbers, for some reason or another.
And THAT is how you start a crew.
Q: Ya Know, I've Just noticed that this place acts like a mini community! i think I'll write...
A: STOP RIGHT THERE we Know that ClanBoB is like a community, because it IS a community. Believe me I know how you feel. You think that you're the first person to ever have this Idea, but you're not, trust me. It probobly sounds like a good idea to you to preform some sort o quazi-experiment on the BoBs in the name of sociology (and of course your own ego inflation) but it's not. Everyone and their sister has written some sort of a paper about an "experiment" they did in a chatroom or some other anonymous interenet place. What will happen is that you'll piss off everyone here and really accomplish little more than trolling. You may prove a few points such as: "People get angry when you insult them" and "People don't like people who pretend to be other people for their own amusment". Good luck on that Nobel prize...fucktard.
Q: Hye, remeber that first EzBoard forum? the one before the crash? WTF happened to it?
A: Two words: GIANT SPIDERS.
...ok I'm kidding, Merc explains it right here:
Quote:
A quick rundown of what happened.
When we first came to EZboard, it was good, and small, and didn't suck. But there were issues with it that became worse as we grew.
Then after the first crash we came back and tried hosting the forum on the clanbob server. To make a long story short: it was too taxing on the server. You have to understand that every time you view a page, thread, reply, post, login...it's all a database call. Databases are not known for being processor friendly applications...espicially under load.
So after that didn't work, they moved to TWC. Blah blah.
When they decided to move back to EZboard, we were going to use our original ezboard forum, but there were some diffuculties...it became apparent that just starting over would be easier, and so we did.
Q: ok time for some BoB history (or perhaps "Histeria"
)A: From what I have been through, and peiced together from ElderBoB accounts, here are some major events in ClanBoB history, Know collectively as the BoB Chronicals:
The Founding of ClanBoB:
According to Dan, ClanBoB was founded in early 2000. Here's a first Hand account from our very own
doctor tofu
!Quote:
There seems to be some confusion about how ClanBOB started. It was started as a website to host Life of Riley and to function as a gaming clan. That was in the days when there were very few webcomics out there. We were introduced to Avalon and Penny Arcade back in the day, and Aaron decided to start a comic. However, Aaron's brother Dan was an extremely talented artist, and so Aaron wanted to involve him. Aaron and I actually came up with the first comic, with the punchline after a Bud commercial that was on at the time. A sketch of the first comic was actually drawn by Aaron, while he was sitting on the beach in Key West. He gave it to Dan, who redrew it, and that is how the magic started.
We didn't start hosting other comics and artwork until much later, when we were much more popular and required a major upgrade in hosting. That upgrade afforded us the space to share the art and comics of what had become the BOB community.
Once the "Big Crash" happened though, it was too much to put back together. Plus, the cost and time involved in hosting everyone else had been becoming a burden, since non-BOB's were taking advantage of the situation.
So ClanBOB reverted to how it began, as the home of LOR, a group of gamers that don't take gaming TOO seriously (thus "BOB"
The Golden Age of BOB
If you've ever talked to an elder, You'll realise that ClanBoB was once very different than it is today, here is a first hand account of this mythical age from Rip*:
Quote:
It was a glorious, heady time full of JTs and Rips and the like, and no one was ever seriously injured and everyone was always happy all the time, continuously, without fail. And, since most of you (practically all) were never there, I would also like to point out that during this time every single BOB received a check in the mail from the United States government for $1,573.82, untaxed, daily, and we could all fly with tiny wings.
*Warning: Trusting Rip may be hazardous
to your health.
Dan the Mad Scientist
Dan spawns 4 genetically altered Bio-children from his secret lab, miles below the Earth's crust. He names them Nuku, Jynk, KaliskaNny and Kattawa beween bouts of minaiacle laughter.
The original "BoBs" Storyline
Beginning in June 2001, The first (and possibly the greatest) Story Arc of "Life of Riley" Began. For more information see comic #111 entitled "And So..." in the Archives.
The "Great Crash"
A great Cataclysim shook the server. Many Bobs were lost in the days and weeks which followed...here is a first-hand account from ElderBoB and Crash Survivor
Phantomgrift:
Quote:
...The great crash came about back in the early seasons of the year 2002. Upon in which the smucks who operated the server the Clan was based off of factored for reasons unknown that Dan, Aaron and Co. had somehow gone two months without paying there bill.
Ironic retrospect shows that the Florida types indeed had paid their bills, but error on the servers part in regards to there paperwork caused them to believe that money was due, ergo, they with no warning or ceremony whatsoever, yanked the plug on ClanBOB causing the subsuquent Great Crash and much discord and anguish here at Bob...
the .net Rebirth
And yet, when all hope (as well as the backup disks) seemed lost, the LeaderBoBs prevailed and rebuilt their great clan, Snatching it from the very jaws of defeat...And there was much rejoicing. "YAAAY!
*[Note, this is when your humble historian First stumbled upon the Bobs, so from now on the records will be much more accurate
]
Penny-Shima
During the September of 2002, The Leader BoBs made a bold decision, to kidnap Gabriel of Penny Arcade forcing his regent Tycho to inform their Multitudes of ClanBoB. Hundreds of initiates flocked to the clan. Still, their arrival was bittersweet, as the current forums could not handle the influx. What followed has become known (to me) as "The Great Migration"
The Great Migration
The BoBs (Both old and new) traveled together to TWC
The Time of Troubles
Yet, all was not well in the land of TWC. The realm was in fact quite volatile. scores of BoBs were lost or banished in the dozens of small eruptions and crashes. To make matters worse, The BoBs were governed by Pierre AKA "Fruitad". A wicked and corrupt Regent.
The Hedonistic Gatherings
what happens when a bunch of Horney young people get together? why they have lots and lots of sex of course. It was during the time of troubles that a pessimistic Australian by the name of Lazarus began the first "Sex Thread' entitled "Stop Humping my leg". many more such gatherings soon followed. Such behavior was sneered upon by the ElderBoB's, who saw such expenditures as "wasteful". The threads nevertheless continued on for some time.
The Crew Wars
A long time ago, in a Forum far far away war broke out. Without Ample ElderBoB Leadership, The NewBoB's fractured into tribes called "Crews". The First documented Crew was the LOR "Rock-Metal Crew" but many soon followed. While a great many BoBs abstained from what they thought "A Fad" Crews became a force to be reconed with. With the factioning came increased tension, which soon broke out into BoB Civil war. (Sparked By Mechzilla for reasons unknown at this time). In the End the crew wars truly had no winner, and eventually brought about the demise of nearly every crew. The only crew left alive currently is the Martial Arts Crew, which remained neutral in the conflict.
The Cult of the Stinies
In the Fall of 2002, a bizzare gathering took place. Upon this day 2D called upon fellow BoBs to become "Stinies". in the weeks and month which followed, 2D's following grew to exponential preportions. The Cult went through quite a few different incarnations, culminating in one known as "Stiney, Get me a Danish". Shunned by many for their "Spamish" Behavior, the Stinies endured. Dispite many hardships and objections they persist even to this day.
The founding of Slashtopia and subsequent "Slashtopian War"
After the destruction wrought by the Crew Wars, a new nation was formed by SlashInfinity, the soveirgn nation of "Slashtopia". Almost immediatly, the Dark Lord Rip declaired Slashtopia an affront to himself and lead a massive war against the new nation, under the rallying cry of "Fuck Slashtopia." Rip's minions and allies marched onto the battle feild. to this ay I am not clear on why, but a few weeks into the war Rip pulled back his armies. perhaps he went mad, or felt that the slashtopians had fought well enough to exist, or more likely he just became bored. Either way, Slashtopia was spared from destruction.
The BoB Exodust
Lead By the
Goddess CowkittyThe BoBs (though there was some dissent among the youngsters who had know TWC as their only home) packed up and moved yet again. As the BoB's uncerimoniosly threw off the proverbial yoke of Fruitaid and set off into the unknown. Shortly thereafter, Returning to their native lands, the very EZBoards where we find ourselves currently.
The EZ Renaissance
With the BoBs once again upon their native soil, Ancient BoB traditions Returned. Practices such as Mopping and BoB naming, which had become lax during the Time of Troubles, Once again took the center stage. These Practices were embraced by BoBs young and old alike, as they pulled together in an attempt to re-create the Ancient BoB utopia destroyed in the Great Crash.
The "Five"
Some time after the beginning of the renissance, the BoB's aquired a few new artists. (hopefully someone will fill me in on who and how) Dan looked upon the new 5 day a week "life of Riley" and saw that it was good. And there was much rejoicing.
Indiana Agent
Renown Archeologist an nazi fighter Agent #1 discovers the lost ruins of pre-crash ClanBoB. for the first time non-elder BoBs are grante a first hand peek into BoB history. (Hopefully Agent #1 will grace us with a tale of his dangerous journey!)
The end of "the Five"
Dan Goes on Sabbatical, and then comes back at Full power. Dan returns Life of Riley to it's original state, smiting his artist Demi Gods like the Titian Chronos. I think he ate Brian.
The Banishment of Franger
The infamous outlaw known only as "Franger" was finally captured by "The Man". Apparently he took his crime spree just a little too far. To the delight of some and the dissapointment of others, Regent Mercan Banished him from the Clan of BoB, never to return...Though sometimes, when the moon is full...it is said that you can hear him Howling in the night..FUUUCKSPEEEEAARRR!
The Attempted Crew Revival
Some dilligent NewBoBs, upon reading the histories, decided to attempt to re-create the age of crews, and perhapse ensight the crew wars once again. The first new Crew was Synkr0nized's "Tank Crew" but a few others followed. This attempted revival lasted for about a week an then died. The only casualty was my dignity.
The Bay of Ubersite incident
ClanBoB came close to it's very first internationl Flame-war when two members of the Ubersite community came to spam ClanBoB at the behest of the infamous Franger. While both their attacks were quite futile, many BoBs were no dount irritated. Xaenyth, a BoB from TWC, declared war on Ubersite, an Idea embraced by many BoBs. The Xaenyth retracted his earlier statement and made an informal "treaty" with one Ubersite poster "Raviebaby". Still many BoBs did not want peace, but longed to begin an anti-Ubersite campaign, which angered Xaenyth. In the end it was revealed that the entire instance was a hoax concoted by a psuedo-journalist as "research" for an article. this outraged many BoBs more that the original insults. I believe there was at least one call for the unfortuante firebrand's head.
The End of The LOR forum
And out of the darkness, like a theif in the night the Leader BoBs did battle with the now nearly deserted Lor forum. It had grown craven and evil with the absence of posting, and thus they threw down their opponent and smote it's ruin upon the mountainside...or something. i'm really not sure what happened, i woke up one day and it was gone.
The Banishment of the Twin Trolls
With the power vaccume caused by the banishment of the great outlaw known as Franger, and the noted absence of the Dark Lord Rip. New contenders to the throne of Supream Troll Arose. Chief amongst them were those known as 2D, the founder of the stinies, who was turned evil by continued use the One Ring of Power, and another named McTen. I myself am not sure just what happened, but after repeated warining and a temporary suspension, Regent Mercan Apprehended the trouble makers and banished them from the garden of BoB, to forever wander the net in stigeon darkness...or the Stiny.org forums, whichever really.
The Redemption of Cain
Cain, one of the oldest and most terrible forces of evil ever to stalk the halls and floors of ClanBoB, was defeated. Not by the forces of Mercan and the other Leader BoBs, but by the birth of his first child. Where once a terrible force of nature that motherBoBs warned their newbie's about stood, now there was a changed man; One of goodness and charity.
The Return of Evil Cain
...And it was all a filthy lie! Cain never had a child! He never turned good! He came in and kicked sand in my eyes...Ok so we probobly shouldn't have seen this coming. He even tricked me into driving his drunk ass to the hospital. Babes wail in fear and motherbobs go back to using him as an incentive to get newbobs to eat their vegetables. boo fucking hoo
The "Boondocking" of the Mafia
And Lo, I, your humble historian, did see that corruption in ClanBoB did go unchecked and I along with Stelteck, Zengus, and a few others did go Boondock Saints on the ClanBoB Mafia. We waged a private war against corruption throughout the forums. Blood flowed, bullets flew, and silly things happened. Individually we killed off most of the active members, including their leader Pheebs, but we were all brought lo (killed) by Revolution Man (the "Discipliner") unleashing a pokemon-like Iraqi with a pipe bomb up his ass. I declaired Victory, and the war was over, though a few wished it to continue. And So the Saints disappear into the past. perhaps someday, when
corruption again strikes this forum, we shall return and rain divine Justice upon the evildoers, for:
Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked, shall flow like a river. the three shall spread their blackened wings and be the vengeful striking hammer of God.
The Re-birth of the LOR Forum
And LO, like the Proverbial Pheonix rising from the Proverbial Ashes and returning to full Proverbial Glory the Proverbial LOR Forum...wait...that's not proverbial...that's real...well sorta...*ahem!* ANYWAY the Not-Quite-Proverbial-But-In-Fact-Sorta-Real LOR Forum returned...I think.
The Disappearance of the LeaderBOBs
A terrible trajedy struck the Halls of of BOBlimpus, home of the leaderBOBs, when what we assume to be a freind of the LeaderBOBs took his own life. The ClanBOB.net site went down, at first it was meant to be for a week, then two weeks, then no word. Even Regent Merchan was left in the dark. Many of the BOBs began to wonder if they would be forced to wander the world in stigeon darkness till the end of time, eating only suffering and breathing only pain. Many cried that the Day of BOBnarock, the Twilight of the Clan was at hand, while others Prophecised that Aaron and Dan would return, as both an olive branch and scythe, bringing judment for the wicked and retoring the rule of the LeaderBOB. For now, we must wait and see.
Crew Wars II
Once again without the prescence of the LeaderBOBs, the Clan was thrown into uncertain anarchy, Two groups came out of the Chaos to jockey for power, the "BREAD CREW", started by myself, the one true path to total bready goodness, and the "MEAT CREW" Started by that godless butcher Soul Reaper, an affront to all that is human and moral. Both groups were actually a euphamism for the argument between Religion and Science (inspired by an analogy of a Butcher trying to do a bakers Job, while actively working to denounce the value of the baker's bread, and vice versa) but soon other Food-Related Crews sprang up, such as the "Cheese Crew" "the Human Brains Crew" and the cheif enemy of both Bread and Meat, "The Pizza Crew". The Pizza Crew eventually won the day, after a long, costly, and silly battle with both the Bread and Meat Crews. Then, just as Mechzilla was declaring victory, the Bread crew rose again, as thousands of big bready zombies and devored the Pizza Crew's brains, therfor making the "Human Brains Crew" the winner.
The Aaron Cometh
And LO, the LeaderBOB Aaron didst see that in his absence, the BOBs were lost. Some had even begun to worship golden calves and such...ith. and lo he didst return and reforge clanBOB, and bring aboutith more DiD episodes. sadly, his Brother Dan was stillith nowhere to be...foundith...ith.
ClanBOB 2: Electric Boogaloo
and...well I guess Dan came back and started LOR again...hey gimmie a break I spent like 5 minutes thinking of that title.
that's all for now, Have fun and I hope you enjoy ClanboB as much as i do.
*edited 9/13/05 for formatting*
*edited 9/14/05 for spelling/grammar*
